Small Ball?

His jersey says #17 (cm) but he should be wearing #11.. (I’ll do the math – 4 1/3 inches)

The New York Knicks Basketball Superstar Jeremy Lin is sometimes big on the court, but unfortunately always small in the bedroom!  It may have been one of the reasons that the Knicks weren’t long for the playoff season!  The Heat were big men on campus in the series and it was sad that Lin couldn’t make it back into the lineup.  Without Bosh who is injured, the Miami Heat may no longer avoid small ball and follow in the tiny footprints of the NY Knicks!  So how can such a big sensation like Lin,  have such a small pen, you ask?

Lin (student) vs. LaBron James (instructor) 2012 NBA Playoffs

Let’s do a Lin-vestigation!

You would think a superstar on the hardwood would be able to make some serious hay in the bedroom, right?  Big hands, big feet right? It may not be the case at all, ladies when it comes to LinMan!  (I did read that there is a big demand for Asian looking gay men in the club scene because of Lin’s popularity – which is for another blog) There is still a lot of love in the Big Apple for the way this guard played when he was in, but he ended the season more like a Big Zero instead of a Big Hero. For a town that never sleeps, Jeremy Lin proved to cause a lot of ZZZ’s verses 3’s this playoff season.  Many unfazed women and male supporters don’t seem to mind if there’s nothing down there -if those rumors about lil Lin are accurate!

Is it in, Lin?

Jason Whitlock wrote it best, “Some lucky lady in NYC is gonna feel a couple inches of pain tonight”, a reference to Lin’s sexual prowess. Jason caught a lot of flack for that stereotypical joke, but it was kinda funny to read.  I know, stereotypical comments can hurt feelings and all, but holy cow, toughen up America!  Stupid jokes are not hate crimes or racism gone amuck, they are just stupid jokes.  Whatever happened to self- esteem and that saying, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?”  Did that go out in the 70’s? Back from my rant, Well, Jeremy Lin may need more than an injection of some magic potion a little higher up than his knee from what I hear from the street.  Now, as Jason said, it may not be his fault, because his genes what fills his jeans.  You can pick a pocket, pick a nose, but you can’t pick your parents. (Stupid joke epidemic) Maybe Jeremy needs to add some Asian tricks to make up for his shortcomings in the sack and then he can truly be BalLin.

Root Growing Powder – (tongkat ali) Maybe we call it Lintongali?  (NY Knicks Trainer’s Room)

Jeremy, you may already know since you are a Harvard grad, but it is possible to get penile and testicle enlargement from taking pasak bumi (tongkat ali)! The NY Knicks should have put a large dose in their team Gaterade bucket – it may have helped them play some defense! Getting your junk to grow is a direct effect of the root’s testosterone enhancing properties.  I am not sure if it would trigger a positive on your performance enhancing urine test, but perhaps if you start hitting home runs they may want to run one.

Sex Vacations

Jeremy Shu-How Lin’s roots are from Taiwan and China, but all the sex craving women from his old rompin ground load up and head to the seashores of Indonesia!  Women there know that good things don’t always come in small packages and head for greener pastures and bedrooms (www.fourseasons.com/jakarta/)!  So not everything is “made in China” – lovemaking seems to be an export business!  Why would women pack their bags and head south?  Size Matters.

Abstract

Now playing for the NY Knicks – #35 a short and round forward, with huge junk from Jakarta, Dusty “the bone” Warrior!

The reason for this preference by Japanese and Chinese women is not the bone in the guys’ nose, but the bone in the guys’ clothes.  It is true that Indonesian men are the best endowed in all of East and Southeast Asia, which likely is a consequence of the fact that tongkat ali (pasak bumi in Indonesian) is so popular in the country.

Linsanity is certainly a big phenomenon – bigger than life actually.  But now it isn’t all about Tongkat Ali – as there is a Lin -Bud marijuana blend that doesn’t make anything bigger, but your legal fees.  Just like the Knicks championship run – it all went up in a pile of limp Lin smoke!

One way to hide your smallness, is to hang out with even smaller, like Spikey L’ Lee!  Why is it that those with the small in the pants seem to have the biggest glasses and mouths?  Well, there’s always next season for the Lil Knickers who are all lining up in Chinatown looking for a bigger future.

Time to say Linbye for now,

Dr. Darrin Frye

SPACE PROBE 2012

The search for life inside the rectal vault of man

The prostate gland is a walnut-sized organ tucked away where the sun don’t shine, and although it often needs medical screening, it doesn’t always get it.

Virtual Robotic Fingers can go where no man has dared to go (outside of west Hollywood anyway)

About 1 in 6 U.S. men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer at some point in their life. About 6 in 6 men dreaded going to their doctor every year to get their rectum probed. Sad part, in the U.S., about 217,000 men are diagnosed with prostate cancer each year, and 32,000 die.

Go Deep or Go Home

While most would think that when their annual rectal exam is “normal”  it would be very reassuring, but the DRE (digital rectal exam) is not designed to detect early cancers.  The space probe of the rear-end kind mainly reveals just the size and shape of the prostate gland.  Remember, tumors have to be very advanced before they can be felt, so there is a big push to find better ways to detect and treat prostate cancers and treat them when they are small.

Deliverance

The thought of going for a prostate exam can drive most men to drink.  Dropping their pants and bending over is the last thing most men want to ever do, as it can be embarrassing, and uncomfortable.  Actually, it is a lot like what we see when men come in for blood draws.  They get all worked up ahead of time, and once the blood is taken they say, “wow, that was nothing!”  The reality is that all men must get their prostates checked routinely, and although it is more than nothing, doesn’t cause banjo nightmares throughout the rest of your life.

“Try to get a boner now”

No gain, just pain

So, what is the better way to see if you have prostate cancer?  We have used the Prostate Specific Antigen (PSA) test, which is a blood test to see if there are signs that cells are starting to become malignant.  While it is good www.beacheslab.com, high levels of PSA only sometimes signals prostate cancer.  It can also indicate an infection or an enlarged prostate (BPH), or tiny tumors that may never pose a threat.   Also, if you have had sex in the past 24 – 48 hours that can also raise your levels, so I always warn my guys not to have crazy sex before the blood test day.  Bad thing is, if the PSA is high we often recommend a biopsy, where we cut small pieces out of your prostate and send it to the lab.  Most men who undergo a biopsy for an abnormal PSA test don’t have prostate cancer, so pain, but no gain!

New Test for prostate CA!

Pee PCA3

Science has brought us a new (and expensive) test for prostate cancer (CaP), the urinary PCA3 gene test. Remember, serum PSA levels are not specific for CaP but this new marker has a much greater degree of CaP specificity than PSA testing.  Perhaps we can cut out all that cutting out of prostate biopsies (1 million per year in US). But, the way you have to get the sample…you have to do a Attentive Rectal Exam and then have the patient urinate.  That means you put your finger in as far as possible and you mash down hard on the prostate over and over to get the cells to loosen up to be peed out.

Attentive Rectal Exam = Prostate Milking = Means smashing the ole walnut with the gloved finger!

Rove you Rong Time Sailor

Working girls – should be able to bill Medicare for Happy Rear Endings!

These Asian girls have been doing prostate milking for years, and who knew they could have been screening the Johns for prostate cancer.  Their medical exam (sex massage) begins with a thorough soaping down in a large tub.  After that, there’s a romp on the bed to last about an hour and half and for some they pay for a happy ending which could include prostate massage (milking) with yikes, non-gloved finger(s)!  Some feel that emptying the prostate is therapeutic and reduces the risk of cancer in it’s own right.  The jury is still out on that one.  Price is between 1,000 and 1,600 baht ($32-52.00) plus tips.  Turns out this is the same amount Medicare pays us doctors for doing the DRE!

Aneros Helix Prostate Stimulator $47.38

For those who have to do it outside the doctors office..The prostate dildo,  referred to as the Rain Maker,  can be used to stimulate the prostate gland in men.  Some say the prostate gland could be the ‘male G-spot’ and is stimulated for either medical or sexual purpose, or I guess both.  Some have renamed the sensitive area the “P-spot.”  So, if you wanted, you could do the attentive Aneros Helix, then pee in a cup, and send it to my lab, www.beacheslab.com, and we can find out what it says.  And for those who want to be tested every week – buy a banjo and move to West Virginia.

On a serious note – Prostate Cancer is horrible and can be deadly.

Earl Woods

Tiger Woods’ father was diagnosed with prostate cancer in 1998 and successfully treated with radiation, but the cancer returned more aggressively in 2004. Mr. Woods died on May 3, 2006 at the age of 74.  Even though Tiger is doing well of late with work, and perhaps with Elin, each day without his papa has got to be a sad one.  Unfortunately, black men have a much higher rate of prostate cancer, so it is important to get routine physicals and labwork, especially if you are undergoing hormone replacement therapy (HRT) with testosterones or human growth hormone.  For one of the best centers you may consider www.pbpmed.com. I am a big fan of Tiger’s and hope nothing but the best for him and his family.

Time to Re Glove,

Dr. Darrin Frye

Sperm can be quite surprising sometimes!

Men produce 1500 sperm every second, and depending on the environment surrounding them, they can be fast or slow.  (This is quite independent of how fast or slow a guy gets to orgasm!) We have always known that nutrition is important to health, but we underestimated how important vitamins and minerals are to the speed of sperm and enhancing reproductive success.

In sperm and sex, most men start out pretty fast but peeter out quickly.  Sperm ejaculated in the vagina may last a week, but outside the body survives only a few hours.  Average time to ejaculation during intercourse – 2 -3 minutes!  All in all, this is a sprint race to say the least!

Cameron, what’s good for making babies may not be that good for making beautiful locks.

Semen Hair Nourishment?  Named the “Viagra for Hair” this treatment works because semen is packed with protein, so the damaged hair is repaired- and also stand at attention.  $110 a shot.  Is it just me, or does Justin Bieber now look like he is using this product to look more masculine?  (It might work better if he was making it instead of buying it.)

Vitamin D Power (the New Blue pill is Clear!)

Immunohistochemistry demonstrated that the Vitamin D receptor was located predominantly on the head/nucleus of the sperm and mid-piece.  This means that sperm needs vitamin D, and we already knew that Zinc and  Biotin also have a part in how well a sperm travels.  Bottom line -nutrients matter!  Check out www.ivitaminscience.com for the best in nutrient science.

Results show then, that stimulation of human spermatooza in the laboratory with activated vitamin D can increase their forward movement!  This is Big D news!

Besides the mood enhancing tactile suggestion, oysters are also packed with zinc, which promotes healthy sperm and testosterone production. But that’s not even the best part. In 2005, scientist released evidence that oysters contain rare — and effective — amino acids that amp up the release of sex hormones in both men and women.  Viagra on the half shell!

The request follows Jodie Marsh’s 32GG breast sized model’s  decision to quit men and embark on a lesbian love affair.  I think she is already using the hair product?  Gov. Arnold may be available to help her out?  My feeling that she may need more than just vitamins and minerals.

Kali-forn-ia Sperm on Steroids

Forget  libido boosting, Testosterone, or Growth Hormone promoting herbs, power bars, and high-tech memory boosters: The single best supplement for a guys’ or girls’ diet could be two cheeks full of nuts!  (you can start the jokes now)  As far as I can tell, there are health nuts,  nuts who love health, and then there a whole bunch of people who either vote for, or love people who are nuts!

Two Cheeks Full News:  A new research study  demonstrates that naturally occurring antioxidants in pecans may help contribute to heart health and disease prevention. Apparently eating all those bowls of nuts on the bar down the street while drinking beer was the best preventive medicine strategy of all time?!

Ever wonder “Why do we love Acorns so much?”  Acorn Bikinis are indeed Nuts – but I think healthy.  DD in Green is always good for most.

Acorns  are rich in complex carbohydrates, minerals, and vitamins while they are lower in fat than most other nuts. They are also a good source of fiber.  This model is looking fit, but may need to consider a breast lift and nipple reposition surgery consultation.  Saggy acorns is no way to go through life!

And, then there are the women “goddesses” who are attracted to nuts.  Maybe Sheen’s court has an extra dose of nurturing nature in their tiger bloodstreams.   Maybe women feel sorry for nutty guys,  and want to rescue and take care of them.  One lover of nuts wrote, “Personally, I like a bad boys confidence and sexual appetite. They don’t hesitate to throw you around in bed, slap your a**, talk dirty… That is appealing to me.”   I say, once a nut, always a nut.

Speaking of nuts – Democrats are extremely nutty.  President Obama, accompanied by Mayor Dickert, ate a nut kringle (which happens to be Harry Reids nickname) on one of his vacations.  Turns out President Obama thought they tasted terrible, and blamed former Presdient George Bush for it.

Sweet Rosario Dawson loves Rudd’s Nuts at the Spirit Awards – apparently she read the Harvard study that tested more than 83,000 women and found that those who ate nuts five times per week or more significantly lowered their risk for type 2 diabetes.  Rosario has a good grasp on preventive medicine.

Justin Beber – looks just like a squirrel searching for  ”little nuts”

What does Justin Bieber and the crowd at Times Square for New Years have in common? They’re both waiting for balls to drop!  I still don’t know why every little girl goes bananas over this little nutless wonder, maybe they are “little nutty goddesses in training bras?”  
I don’t see anything, Justin!

Beer Nuts Rule,

Dr. Frye

Axe Body Spray, is the best-selling deodorant spray on the market and the bane of households—nationwide.  Axe has an overpowering  smell – but that doesn’t mean that is smells good to women.  Women simply have a much better smelling apparatus than guys do.    Men have biology working against them as their noses that are 200 to 1,000 times less sensitive than a woman’s, plus oily skin holds scents much longer than dry skin.

Androstenol (testosterone steroid) is the scent produced by fresh male sweat, and is attractive to females. Androstenone  (oxidized testosterone steroid) is produced by male sweat after exposure to oxygen and it is perceived as highly unpleasant by females.  So, men who believe that their ‘macho’, sweaty body-odor is attractive to women are deluding themselves, unless they are constantly producing fresh sweat and either naked or changing their clothes every 20 minutes to remove any trace of the oxidised sweat.

Fresh Sweaty Uruguayan League Soccer Man Smell Drives Women Fans Crazy!   Unfortunately, for him, the sexy scent goes to stink by the end of the contest.

This secret ring emits pheromones (Spanish Booty Juice) whenever you push the magic button, and this is used to attract the men/women your way.   These lusty smelling pheromones can only be detected at a distance of about 18 inches, so if the women,or man is hyperopic (can’t see close)  odds the ring would work improve.

Researchers had women smell men’s used T-shirts and rank them according to how attractive the smell is. In the past, women have indicated that the most pleasurable shirts belong to men with different major histocompatibility complex (MHC) genes than they do.

So scientists believe that women can subconsciously smell a man’s genes in his sweat.  It is another good reason for guys and girls to get to the gym.  So singles out there dating, stop looking for a great partner and start smelling for one!

Time to go sweat,

Darrin Frye, MD

 Nice Wonder Melons

Watermelon can have the same effect as Viagra, scientists discovered recently – but apparently Spencer Pratt wasn’t eating enough fleshy fruit and Heidi Montag has put him to the curb.  Divorce went through this May and now she is back on the dating scene.   Indeed, this red love nector can really mend erectile dysfunction (ED)  like natural testosterone and make him sex ready, but does nothing for personality or brains unfortunately.

Watermelon is an amazing treat, and  is packed with citrulline, a compound that relaxes blood vessels – just like the famous blue pills – researchers at the North Carolina State University have found.  Who knew spitting seeds could be more than just a redneck contest, but actually excellent foreplay for lusty lovers!

This is how it all starts…

And, this is how it ends..

Men (and women) have always known that a nice pair of melons can work magic when it comes to libido.  “Have another slice honey!” said Bob.

Sometimes in a pinch, when a ”Desperate Housewife” can’t seem to find a watermelon patch,  this bra could be the next best thing.  Shouldn’t there be a seedless bra?  If your man is out looking in the garden before bedtime, perhaps you better send him over to get a hormone evaluation..  www.pbpmed.com or www.nationwidesi.com would be a good start. 

Or girls call, 1 800 Jesse Metcalfe – aka the “Gardener”.  He probably knows fruits better than most.

Time to go drink some Watermelon Wine!

Dr. Frye

A recent study definitively proved that women’s body goes into sexual overdrive when she smells testosterone.  Her body prepares for a booty call when a whiff of androstadienone – a form of testosterone found in male sweat hits her nostrils. This is unavoidable, unintentional, and entirely animalistic!

Do you think it is a coincidence P. Wentz took Ashlee Simpson to basketball gym? He had to hire sweat with substance!  Wentz has less testosterone than Lady Gaga!   Ashlee, her sister Jessica Simpson, and Pud Wentz also gets excited around sweaty men with orange balls I hear.

Girls with bigger nostrils should therefore have  legs up on other females with smaller proboscises when it comes to seeking male partners.  Paris Hilton knows about about legs up, and now we know why she is always chasing stinky men.  I heard Ms. Hilton is coming out with a new film called, “One Nostril from Paris.”

Pheromones and body odors have been the focus of  much research, and male underarm sweat  is a powerful source that has been shown to improve women’s moods.  I think it is clear why Jennifer Aniston was so unhappy with Brad Pittiful. He lacks any testosterone and his sweat can’t work as an antidepressant!  We may want to warn Angelina Jolie before her mood tanks – it’s unavoidable.

It looks like Kim Kardashian is back out sniffing the bushes (wait- that was the last guy) for a new man.  You would think after getting her nose fixed, she would remove her head from her extremely large rear end and start knowing the difference between stud and dud.  So far, it appears she has a long, long way to go.

Apparently her nose isn’t the problem, I suggest 1 800 Call a Shrink.

Time to work up a sweat,

Dr. Frye,

the TestosteroneMasterMD

Research showed a 69% boost to testosterone – the male sex hormone by being in sunlight. In America as winter begins, there is a dip noticed in both supply of Vitamin D and testosterone which continues till March.  So it is important to get enough sun if you want to have great erections and awesome sex!  Studies now suggest that Vitamin D, and frequent sex may prevent prostate cancer!  The second part of that duo happens to be my most frequently requested prescription.

Swedish women are some of the most beautiful women in the world

The rest of the world has a similar story, but even more intense is the winter in Northern Sweden, where winter lasts 7 months, with two months where the sun never rises above the horizon!  Perhaps these girls are trying to make up for lost sun time – they need testosterone and vitamin D too!  Did you know that we can get boost a girl’s testosterone levels with a prescription cream which can really make a big difference in the bedroom, bathroom, hallway, den, dining room!, wherever?  Well, we can and we call it the “scream cream.” (you figure it out!)  So girls, don’t wait for midsummer – you can put that spice in your life for all seasons!  Get rubbing – and go clubbing!

Sometimes, it is best for all concerned, to just keep the clothes on, and take a supplement. The best one on the market has to be IVitaminScience’s custom vitamin and mineral, at www.ivitaminscience.com. This couple might also want to visit Palm Beach Preventive Medicine – www.pbpmed.com to get on an HCG diet program!

Time to get back in the sun, after I finish throwing up.

Dr. Darrin Frye

Testosterone and Vitamin Master MD

A survey done by the by The New York Academy of Medicine claims that over 40% of young teens in the US have lost their virginity by the age of 14.   Angelina Jolie revealed how unprepared she was for early age intercourse at age 14, when she said, “After having sex for the first time, the emotions didn’t feel enough.

So to feel closer to my mate, I grabbed a knife and cut him.”  Heck, Kelly Osborne was only 13 when she lost her virginity.  She said, ” I convinced myself I wasn’t pregnant, I hadn’t even gotten my period.”  This is only part of this story.

A newly released survey reveals that 63% of all women report significant sexual problems (called female sexual dysfunction or FSD).  What is shocking to me is that the number one issue in the younger women – those under 30, is inability or difficulty in achieving an orgasm!  Many Sexperts suggest that a young women’s difficulty in having the big O (anorgasmia),  is a result of either inexperience with her sexuality, unstable relationship, poor body image, partner ineptness, drug and alcohol interference, or simply lack of practice.  I think all of these things can influence a girl’s potential sexual pleasure, but what is concerning to me is that I feel that there is a more sinister problem extinguishing the flames down below.

Birth Control Pills (BCP) may mean no babies, but also may mean no orgasms!

The Perfect  Storm – 1.  Early Sexual Activity   2.  Birth Control Pills  3.  Female Sexual Dysfunction

Not only are BCP’s the wrong kind of estrogen, and the wrong kind of progesterone, it is also packaged in a pill – all three of these issues are serious enough to consider not selecting it for use in any woman.  But, unfortunately it gets worse.  Taking the BCP sends a woman’s testosterone plummeting towards zero, effectively killing her natural sex drive, and making her mood, motivation, memory, strength, decision making, and sleep much worse.  As if that wasn’t enough, estrogen increases body fat production, and elevates a protein called Sex Hormone Binding Globulin (SHBG).

Sex Hormone Binding Globulin is a protein that goes through the bloodstream looking for testosterone.  Once it finds it, it binds it, effectively eliminating it for use.  So a unsuspecting woman, trying not to get pregnant by taking her BCP, has her testosterone levels being cut severely, and then what’s left is being scavenged up and bound.

So as long as women take birth control pills, they won’t be horny, and those who are having sex won’t be singing any orgasm songs.  If you must take BCP – consider taking a product called, DIM (www.ivitaminscience.com) to reduce cancer risk, and see a good doctor (www.pbpmed.com) who can see if testosterone cream could relight the fire in your panties.

Time to get your O’s back!

Ladies, be careful of the sloppy kisser! 

I’ve been researching  kissing a great deal recently.  Scientists  know that locking lips causes an upswing in oxytocin - (which is released during orgasm too) and we thought perhaps that influenced sexual behavior.  But now we think it’s the testosterone in man’s spit that causes women to want to take their clothes off!  That’s right, there is measurable testosterone in saliva, and other dischargable fluids – and it is thought that sloppy kisses may indeed be a way for a man to increase a women’s sex drive! 

But that isn’t the only danger!

Ancient Eastern Kissing Technique – Huh?  What?

A young woman in southern China has lost her hearing after her boyfriend ruptured her eardrum during an excessively passionate kiss.  A 20 year old girl from Zhuhai, China, went to hospital completely deaf in her left ear after her boyfriend applied some serious suction.  “The kiss reduced pressure in the mouth, pulled the eardrum out and caused the breakdown of the ear.”  Rumor is the man worked at the local water department, and frequently primes the main pump.

Taylor Lautner giving Taylor Swift some spit!  TW  is talented, beautiful, and always is the epitome of class and style.  (Kanye West…enough said..)

Lips are often viewed as a symbol for sensuality and sexuality. This has many origins; above all, the lips are a very sensitive erogenous and tactile organ. Reproductive psychologists have suggested that one reason the female lips are seen as sexually attractive might be because they mimic the appearance and sexual swelling of the labia of the vulva, and that a woman’s lips are effectively a secondary sexual organ.  Some feel that women’s saliva also contains hormones that influence a male’s sexual fertility and desire.  

We make kissable  lips with Restylane in our center www.pbpmed.com and all of my patients attest to the fact that men tend to see them in an entirely different light when their lips are fuller.  You can see a video of this on http://trollydolly.us when we recorded the process!

It’s always kissing time,

Dr. Darrin Frye